And now we wait

Well, I had my appointment with the genetic counselor yesterday.

If I had to sum it up in one word it would be "overwhelming".


Basically I had one small tube of blood drawn, and this tube will tell me if I have the normal, 12% chance of developing breast cancer, or up to an 80% chance.   Umm... terrifying.

She discussed some of the options I would have, depending on which mutations they found.  If they find one of the big guys, the BRAC1 or BRAC2 mutated genes, we have to get serious.  This could involve removal of ovaries and breasts. (did I mention scary?)

If they find one of the more moderate risk mutated genes, we could just take the stronger surveillance route and start mammograms earlier and perhaps alternate those with a breast MRI.

My mother did not get treatment for her breast cancer at CCI.  The only time I had ever been there before was several years ago when my mom was tested for bone cancer.  She did not have bone cancer, and I remember the relief and the immediate tears at the news that the tests were negative.  I never thought that she would die a few years later from a different cancer.

I felt very emotional sitting there, waiting to be called back, and then again in the room,waiting for the counselor to come in.  A weird mixture of grief, and fear, and hope.  The room I was in was just like the room we were in when my mom had the testing for bone cancer.  It made me miss her, and made me afraid for my boys.  I want to be around for them for a long, long time.

The dr said that because my mom had the disease and died so young, that could be an indicator of mutated genes.  But that most people that get tested get negative results.  So I have no idea what to think or how to feel.

I have 3-5 weeks to wait.  If only test results came back as fast in real life as they do on Grey's Anatomy....